This year I have learned so much. And as I sit here and reflect on everything that has happened and how I have delevoped over this past year, I couldn't be happier. It's crazy to think about how times flies. Eight years ago I was exploring through the woods and climbing trees, and now I'm exploring parts of myself, who I am, and my heart. It seems like only yesterday I was in my mother's arms, allowing her to comfort me...to guard me of my fears and failures...now I am going off into the world by myself, facing my fears. I know there will be many times I will fall short and face failure, but to learn from and accept, bringing about many successes in the future. I have learned about God, time, love, and relationships, and just a lot about life in general. I have learned that time does not stop for anyone, no matter what. Every situation and circumstance happens for a reason. I have learned so much about myself. I have opened my heart willingly to others, and whole-heartedly loved. Not only a guy, but those surrounding me...the people that I will always call my friends. Whether it be a relationship that had to be cut off because of timing and distance, or friendships that will be seperated by miles, yet remain so close in my heart, I have loved so much. Love isn't a game. It isn't about being physical. It isn't about having the upper-hand. I have learned that to truly love another, you must love selflessly. To love is to Love like He has loved me. I still cannot wrap my mind around that, but I'm trying, and I don't think that I will ever reach the point to full comprehension. It's so beautiful to think about, and to live out though. Or at least try to do so, anyway. I have learned that to gain, you must sacrifice. To grow as an individual, you have to sacrifice your pride...you have to humble yourself. You have to sacrifice your time. You have to sacrifice your comfort. Being outside of your comfort zone allows you to grow in ways that you would never expect. You have to be weak to be strong, if that makes any sense. I used to (and at times, still do, but not as badly) struggle with pride. I have never found such solace as I have when I humble myself, especially before God. God cares about your heart, not your stylish outfit or your sexy new doo. He will renew you, and give you His Spirit to be all that you need to be. You don't need fancy diamonds to shine for Him. I often struggle with being like the world. At times, I give into many temptations, but I am forgiven. I always find peace again, and am brought back home when I humble myself. I have gained so much from giving up my agenda. I have gained so much from serving...there is no better way for me to spend my time than to selflessly serve, and give my time willingly to others, especially when there is nothing to gain from it than the gift of helping others in itself. The past couple of months I lost sight of what is most important, but I am thankful for the One who has led me back to the right path. I have learned to really be free, you must let go. I had to let go of the place I once called "home", where I was surrounded by relationships & people I have grown to love so much, to move to Alabama, where I am not fond of many faces. I have learned to have courage and to be strong (always reflecting on 1 Corinthians 16:13-14). I had to let go of myself, and let God lead me, because when He is in control everything will work out for me. I had to let go of the past to let God show me His genuine, everlasting love for me. I had to let go of my worries and cares of the world to be truly free. Because of all of this and the different seasons I have been through this past year, I have gained more than I can explain. I have seen so much beauty and I have just learned what is important. I have fallen and risen back up, I have been beaten down and revived, I have cried and laughed...I have struggled, only to gain. Every ending is a new beginning. Every door closed is another door opened. And to every "Good-bye", right around the corner is another "Hello". A few people have been in and out of my life this past year, but each person has taught me a lesson. Each experience is something to learn from. As I am entering college, I feel...prepared. I have no idea what the world will bring, or my place in the world, but I am ready. I'm ready for this new season, for challenges, growth, for a chance to learn more about myself and explore who I am/what I want even more, and to become more knowledgable. I'm ready to love and live every day as if it were my last, to impact His kingdom, and to just let others know about Christ's love for us all....not as much through my words, but my actions. Everything will fall into place as it should be, and wherever He leads, I will follow.
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